::::between REALITY and DREAM::::

the journey of my childhood dream

2011-12-11T18:00:00.001+08:00

Dreams do come true..

this is what i believe when I had the chance to fulfill my childhood dream..

on the 7th October 2011..

It was the day I felt I was all sweet sixteen once again

Seated at the fourth row from the stage,

the view was so amazing that there are no words which could precisely describe it.

A whole good hour of incredible performance which made the whole wait worthy..

It has been almost 10 years since me and my girl last went to watch them during the soccer

match at the Outdoor Stadium Bukit Jalil.

i remembered that me and my girl used to skip school just to spend our whole day to

catch a glimpse of Westlife for our very first time at that moment..

With no hesitation, we got the most expensive tickets so that we could get as close as possible to them

here we are.. camwhoring at the VIP lounge...

The amazing crowds

my favourite part of the performance where everyone used their mobile phones to light up the stadium while westlife was performing "You Raised Me Up"

Special thanks to my best ever companion, my only Westlife geek fan who would share this experience with me

The wonderful experience would never be the same if I attended it with somebody else..

it was well-worthy to share this childhood dream with her ♥

here are some video that i took to save it as my memories..

Westlife first perfomance for the day

Foster The People Live In Malaysia 2011

2011-11-26T07:05:00.002+08:00

Yea.. another Must-Go concert coming soon..

It is the Foster The People who got well known because of their song , Pumped Up Kicks..

This year is seriously a happening year in Malaysia..

From westlife concert to Pitbull to David Foster to Elton John and now this, Foster the People..

it is totally an awesome year.. in case you people do not know who are they..

check out the song below that I have posted ..

Click on the picture to get a clear view of it

yippie.. I have got my ticket.. have you got yours????

If no.. now is the time to get it.. here is the details and link where you can get your tickets...

Get your ticket now here: http://www.ticketpro.com.my/jnp/concert/rock/756753-foster-the-people.html

SIFE World Cup 2011

2011-11-07T20:07:00.001+08:00

Ok.. Let me start this post by saying,

this is one hell of the best SIFE World Cup experience I ever been through...

Last year was held in Los Angeles, and I was given a chance to experience it

and this year was held in Malaysia, another chance to go through it..

People that I have met this year from all around the world,

from Egypt to Morocco to Germany, New Zealand, Puerto Rico, Russia, Kyrgyzstan

and more ...

So my circle of friend grew larger than ever

and even until today, one month after the SIFE World Cup, all of us still kept in touch with each other

the power of Facebook plays apart in this for keeping us in touch..

and without fail, I talked to them like everyday, Facebook, twitter, and skype..

this event is one of the best event I ever attend..

this is the group I met and got closer with

since the first time we met each other..

my lovely sisters , Doha and Nour from egypt

and my brother, Maheez from my university,

last but not least my amazing brother, Youssef from Morocco

SIFE brought a lot us together..

these group of 5 , is the best things i ever had in my life..

we stick together as 5 whenever we go once the event was over..

we spent our day together for few days ..

shopping. food hunting. and clubbing.

every single moment I spent with them is totally unforgetable

and one thing for sure, the friendship between 5 of us is so special that..

it is not going to end just like that..

thank gawd we still have facebook to update on each other what we were doing..

I even brought them down to melaka for a visit

and it was a tiring yet enjoyable to spend with them in my hometown..

from telling the about malacca history, to teaching them how to use a chopsticks

and even bringing them to try out all the local food they never seen or heard before.

my 2 lovely egyptian friends that I never regret knowing them..

we had our laughing session together like all the time..

it is so nice to share different culture of both of us..

they ask me lotsa question about Asian that I never know exist.

and I myself even ask them question about egypt

which I saw in the movie 'the mummy returns'..

at least now i know which part of the movie is true and which is not..

the ending for Kim Kardashian Fairytale

2011-11-01T01:33:00.000+08:00

Honestly, today I actually downloaded Kim Kardashian's Fairytale Wedding to watch..

yes finally.. i am able to watch this..

then, few hours late.. it is all over the news that she is filling a divorced today..

it is so freaking unbelievable as her wedding is so perfect that everyone would dream of.

and this is how she ended her October???

with a divorce???

So , even the she is trending in the twitter.. the topic of the day for everyone..

Got this news online..

Unfortunately, Kim Kardashian's fairy-tale romance has come to an abrupt end.

The E! reality star is planning to file for divorce from Kris Humphries this morning, a little over two months after she and the basketballer wed in a wedding fit for a princess, E! News has confirmed.

So what went wrong?

MORE: Kris Humphries scammed by wedding guest?

PlayKelly Ripa's Halloween Spirit

PlayKim Kardashian's Sexy Halloween Costume

PlayKourtney and Kim Take New York Season 4

There's no official word yet, but Kim has promised to send us statement soon.

The couple announced their engagement back in May after a whirlwind six months of dating. They tied the knot on Aug. 20 in front of a superstar congregation, including all members of Kim's reality family, and many celeb guests, including Brody Jenner and Avril Lavigne, Lindsay Lohan, Eva Longoria, Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough, Kathy Lee Gifford, Mel B, Brittny Gastineau, La La and Carmelo Anthony, Sugar Ray Leonard, Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds, Alan Thicke, Mario Lopez, Joe Francis, George Lopez, Serena Williams, Lara Spencer, Maria Menounos, Simon Huck and Jillian Barberie.

After a quick honeymoon, the two settled in the Big Apple to shoot the second season of Kourtney and Kim Take New York.

Sadly, rumors of a rift between the newlyweds have been ramping up in recent weeks, after both the 31-year-old Keeping Up With the Kardashians star and 26-year-old NBA player were spotted making increasingly solo appearances—often without their wedding rings.

Both repeatedly brushed off reports that their lack of bands should be indicative of trouble, with Kim explaining that she simply didn't wear it while she worked out and that nothing more should be read into it. But that did not turn out to be the case.

We wish both Kim and Kris the best of luck through this undoubtedly difficult time.

this is where I find out that Kim's marriage is over

Greyson Chance Live in Malaysia

2011-10-31T13:43:00.001+08:00

Catch Greyson Chance Live in Malaysia, by singing just 2 sentences of Greyson Chance's "Waiting Outside the lines" ..

First, like this page (http://www.facebook.com/C4RROTMILK?sk=wall)

and then post a video of yours at the link as below, you will entitle with 2 tickets. only limited for 200 video which means 400 tickets will be given out..

Greyson Chance Meet & Greet Contest, early bird 200 contestants will automatically get 2 passes to the showcase.

This contest is open to all Malaysian citizens at the time of entry, except employees of CarrotMilk Advertising Sdn. Bhd, Universal Music Malaysia and its subsidiaries, their immediate family members, agencies, advisors, franchisees, suppliers, and any persons assisting or involved in this contest.

Participants can only submit one entry and is able to “Like” multiple videos. All videos have to be submitted via the contest form created by Universal Music Malaysia. Grand prize winners will be selected based on the total "Likes" collected; Inspiring comment winners will be chosen by Universal Malaysia based on the inspiration of the comment.

So, start joining now.. Duedate for the contest would be 7th November 2011, one week from now.

And finally, I need a big favor.. for my lovely cousin Jamie Lum .. kindly click like on this link (http://www.facebook.com/C4RROTMILK?sk=app_167803713310113) and then, it will lead you to a Greyson chance contest page.. next click on "who's in" column.. go to page 3.. look for the video with the name Lum Choy Ling Jamie. and lastly, please click like on that video as many as you can , unlimited likes .. so help my cousin to win a chance to meet Greyson chance. thanks!

Insipiring quote

2011-09-29T14:08:00.000+08:00

The reason why I still keep in touch with my ex teacher, because the way he speaks and how he advise me to become a better person inspiring me a lot.. he is the only teacher knew me the best.. whenever he found out I faced some problems from family, to friendship to relationship, he never fails to be there to guide me... all this while he knew exactly what I have gone through, so he always try to get in touch with me to make sure I am alright by asking my brother or my mom,. He is the only teacher I admired the most. his courage, his strength and all this positive thinking towards life totally amazed me even though he is half paralyzed due to an unwanted accident. He no longer able to walk and hold anything but he still stand strong showing that the world has not end. He loves telling me how he got through all this tough moment of his and telling me no point dwelling on the past because the past will never changed, we can only move forward to seek a better life. Looking at him and looking at myself, I feel so ashamed of myself because I am still very healthy, yet I am there complaining the suffering life I have gone through but he himself never even complain much yet stay happy as long as he can. Really appreciate to have such great teacher along my side.

" Each time we try to forget, we keep getting back the same old pain by remembering because we do not come with a “delete” function. We can only forgive and learn. Each time we forgive, we give our pains away and they are no longer ours. In forgiving others and ourselves, we remove thorns so that wounds can heal and happiness returns even as pain diminishes. Forgive, and there is nothing or No-thing to forget"

"How can memories remain if even the very brain cells that hold them do not. Even photographs fade, what more memories. The only way to cherish life is to live each moment totally, truely and to its very best. A moment holds all of life and if moments do not last forever, nothing ever will."

~Quote taken by my inspiring teacher~

Pottermore clues

2011-09-27T23:19:00.003+08:00

ok. I won't deny that Im kinda obsess with Pottermore..

It is now like the 2nd 'facebook' account of mine..

the only sad part about it was I managed to finish the first book

but only able to continue the 2nd one next year...

The 2nd book of Harry Potter will only be available next year..

All I can do now is get to more Harry Porter fans around the world

and battle with others to gain point for your house...

I am a Gryffindor!

Here, I post up things that I have found and encounter for each chapter.

Chapter 1
NUMBER FOUR, PRIVET DRIVE
-Click on the road sign to unlock 'the places'
Chapter 2
SOMETHING PECULIAR IS HAPPENING
- Click on the lamp post to unlock 'Measurements'
THE CUPBOARD UNDER THE STAIRS
-Click on the photo frame on the small table by the stairs to unlock Vernon and Petunia Dursley.
-Collected items: alarm clock, postcard, hammer and nails
Chapter 3
HARRY RECEIVES A MYSTERIOUS LETTER
-Collected items: salt n pepper
THE HUT ON THE ROCK-
-Collected items: seaweed, seashells
Chapter 4
HAGRID ARRIVES
-Click hagrid to unlock ghost plots
-Collected items: candle
HARRY RECEIVES HIS LETTER AT LAST
-Collected items: chipped cup
Chapter 5
ARRIVING AT DIAGON ALLEY
-Click zoom times, click on a piece of paper on the floor to unlock shopping list , click one of the bulding on the left to unlock clothing
Chapter 6
THE HOGWARTS EXPRESS
-zoom in twice to unlock Platform Nine and Three,click on the green small animal after the first zoom to unlock Toads, click on the signboard on the left ‘The Hogwarts Express.
-Collected items: collect badge
THE JOURNEY TO HOGWARTS
-Collected items: Dumbledore Chocolate Frog Card, Morgana Chocolate Frog Card, a sprout-flavoured bean
Chapter 7
THE ENTRANCE HALL
-click on the black figure on the right to unlock Professor McGonagall’
Chapter 8
HARRY'S EARLY DAYS AT HOGWARTS
-Collected items: Galleon,Circe Chocolate Frog Card, a book of Hogwarts: A History
HAGRID'S WOODEN HOUSE
-Collected items: dried nettles,wolfsbane,Dried Billywig stings,home-made rock cake, Paracelsus Card
FLYING LESSON
-Collected items: card'Quidditch through the Ages', Remembrall
Chapter 9
THE TROPHY ROOM
-to unlock familars .. zoom in. it is on left side door. looks like a cat ..
-Collected items: Galleon,A jar of eels’ eyes
Chapter 10
HARRY'S SPECIAL DELIVERY
-Collected items: Galleon,

CHARMS CLASS

-Collected items:Galleon,Hogwarts School Subjects

THE MOUNTAIN TROLL
-Collected items: horned slug ( at the sink no.4), Hengist of Woodcroft Chocolate Frog Card
Chapter 11
CHARMS HOMEWORK
- click on the book to unlock 'original forty'
-Collected items:galleon
THE GOLDEN SNITCH
- to collect Golden Snitch, hold on to your curson in one position then click on it
Chapter 12
THE LIBRARY
-Collected items: Merlin Chocolate Frog Card, 3 books of A Study of Recent Developments in Wizardry', 'Important Modern Magical Discoveries, Great Wizards of the Twentieth Century, 'Notable Magical Names of Our Time',
CHRISTMAS AT HOGWARTS
-Collected items: book 'Curses and Counter-Curses,Galleon, an infusion of wormwood, wizard chess set,mistletoe berries

THE DISUSED CLASSROOM

- click on the mirror against the wall to unlock The Mirror of Erised

-Collected items: galleon

Chapter 13

NICOLAS FLAMEL IS FINALLY REVEALED

- clicking the right page of the book to unlock‘Nicolas Flamel’

THE HOODED FIGURE
-Collected items: Helga Hufflepuff Chocolate Frog Card, galleon
Chapter 14
HAGRID'S SECRET
-Collected items: 4 books 'Modern Magical History','Dragon Species of Great Britain and Ireland','From Egg to Inferno, A Dragon Keeper’s Guide'
THE EGG IN THE FIRE
-Collected items: book 'Dragon Breeding for Pleasure and Profit',dragon egg
A PLAN FOR NORBERT THE BABY DRAGON
-Collected items: galloen
Chapter 15
HARRY BECOMES AN OUTCAST
-Collected items:galleon,Rowena Ravenclaw Chocolate Frog Card(last zoom in-center, on the table)
INTO THE FORBIDDEN FOREST
-Collected items :Leaping toadstools (look like mushroom in red) ,unicorn blood ,wolfsbane,
Chapter 16
THE WINGED KEYS
- the key located somewhere on the bottom left side
THE POTION PUZZLE
-select on the blue potion then the purple one
Chapter 17
THE PHILOSOPHER'S STONE
- professor quirrell, click on professor, a person holding cloth. the philosopher' stone (Harry's hand)
THE HOSPITAL WING-
-Collected items: Cliodna Chocolate Frog Card,salamander blood, bezoar
THE END-OF-YEAR FEAST-
Collected items: Godric Gryffindor Chocolate Frog Card,Galleon

New York Cheese cake

2011-09-18T17:40:00.000+08:00

Ingredients

15 graham crackers, crushed
2 tablespoons butter, melted
4 (8 ounce) packages cream cheese
1 1/2 cups white sugar
3/4 cup milk
4 eggs
1 cup sour cream
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1/4 cup all-purpose flour

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease a 9 inch springform pan.
In a medium bowl, mix graham cracker crumbs with melted butter. Press onto bottom of springform pan.
In a large bowl, mix cream cheese with sugar until smooth. Blend in milk, and then mix in the eggs one at a time, mixing just enough to incorporate. Mix in sour cream, vanilla and flour until smooth. Pour filling into prepared crust.
Bake in preheated oven for 1 hour. Turn the oven off, and let cake cool in oven with the door closed for 5 to 6 hours; this prevents cracking. Chill in refrigerator until serving.

Glee Fever

2011-08-26T20:51:00.005+08:00

What am I up to..

nowadays....

1. The Glee Project

Best ever reality competition series till

Im so addicted to it that I watched

repeatedly all 10 episodes like everyday..

Even youtube sensations singer like Christina Grimmie

and Sam Tsui went for audition to get the role in Glee season 3..

Too bad they didnt make it into the top 12..

http://www.myspace.com/gleeauditions

the link shows who went through the audition of this project..

Am the No.1 fan of Glee..

been watching from season 1

even this audition, I never miss it..

The winners of Glee Project

Damian Mcginty and Samuel Larson

this means that you are going to see both of them

in the new season of Glee

My only two favourite casts

Cameron Mitchell and Damian..

Cameron actually gave up his position for Damian..

that was sad. or else Cameron for sure will be

part of Glee member for season 3

his nerdy look and awkward dance move with amazing voice

made me like obsessed over him.

ohya.. FYI, he was Demi Lovato's first ever ex boyfriend

such a cutie boy he is.... :)

my 2 favourite video so far..

this video is amazing.. it has meaning story behind this video..

2.Baking...

I really dont know what has gone wrong with me..

I bake a lot recently..

Plus, all the recipe of the food that I made was my first attempt

due to the curiosity of myself after watching too much

of cooking reality series such as MasterChef and Hell's Kitchen..

my very first attempt of baking a souffle...

just because i was to eager to know

how does it taste like

that American love this dessert so much

and my first attempt making a mille crepe..

Check this out

2011-08-22T17:43:00.000+08:00

Follow my current active blogs:

http://mychaoticlyfe.tumblr.com/

http://betweenmemoriesandmyself.tumblr.com/

Harry Potter "Pottermore"

2011-08-02T18:47:00.003+08:00

Clue 3 for today was

In the Gryffindor versus Slytherin Quidditch match, in Harry's third year, how many points is Gryffindor leading by before Harry catches the Golden Snitch?
Multiply this number by 35.

the answer is below:

http://quill.pottermore.com/2100 (type this in your URL link)

feel free to ask me anything to get into the registration..

I am finally in! yippie *jumping for joy*

good luck people!

Westlife Gravity Tour 2011 in Malaysia

2011-08-01T14:03:00.003+08:00

Oh My Gawd!! Yes!

it is Westlife...

WESTLIFE back to Malaysia..

Yes !

Westlife , the most successful boy band in the history will be gracing our shore with their everlasting hits such as ‘Flying Without Wings’, ‘Fool Again’, ‘Uptown Girl’, ‘You Raise Me Up’, ‘when you’re looking like that’ and songs from their latest album, ‘Gravity’. For many seeing the 4 hunks, Nicky Byrne, Kian Egan, Mark Feehily and Shane Filan would be a dream come true.

Gravity Tour is directed by creative director William Baker, who is known for his work with Kylie Minogue, Leona Lewis andBjork. With a new touring band and musical director, the group stated this tour will be "bigger and better" then their previous feats.

There fore, this concert is definitely something not to be miss.. Westlife, my favourite all time band since i was a kid.. No doubt, am getting the premier seats for it.. I don't mind spending my whole fortune if I have to get the best seat for the concert.. so people, am broke now.. am no longer available to any outings...spent my whole fortune for the RM503 premier seat.. it is worth afterall..

As, I remembered the last Westlife's concert that I attended till the extend that I had to skip my school with my friend. was the concertthat was held at the National Stadium Bukit Jalil on May 26,2001which means it was 10 years ago since we last met the band.... now, after 10 years, my dream came true again! This time, I am going with the friend of mine who has the same interest towards the band..the so-called longtime die hard fans of the awesome boyband..

But, the sad thing was i called the ticket centre hotline.. and they told me that no camera was allowed =.= So freaking ridiculous.. I dont care, am gonna sneak my camera in.. Mom gave me the green light, cuz she know I was so into Westlife since I was a kid...but she told me that, I am always spending more than what I earn..yes, i have to admit that I spent too much yet I wont deny the fact that

it is worth spending for things that I love

*click on the picture to enlarge*

Date and time: FRIDAY 7 OCTOBER 2011, 8.30PM
Venue: THE PUTRA INDOOR STADIUM, BUKIT JALIL

TICKETS ON SALE AT THE FOLLOWING OUTLETS:
www.ticketpro.com.my & www.airasiaredtix.comVictoria Music, Guitar Store and Rock Corner (RM355, RM255, RM155, and RM95)

For enquiries please call the Westlife Hotline: +603-78807999 (Ticketpro) / +603 - 8775 4666 (AirAsiaRedTix)

Westlife live in Kuala Lumpur: Gravity Tour 2011 - specially brought to you by JS Concerts in association with Midas Promotions with official hotel Hilton KL and official label Sony Musicand official radio stations Lite fm, Mix fm and Sinarfm.

Follow us on Twitter (twitter.com/msnbuzz) and 'Like' us on ourMSN Malaysia Entertainment Facebook pageto get the latest celebrity gossip and exclusive interviews with your favourite

local and Hollywood celebrities.

Check out the Westlife Tv Commercial for Malaysia concert

check out one of the Westlife's single.

sweet escape with lovelies

2011-07-31T21:13:00.003+08:00

Had a sudden plan with my love ones for food hunting and hang out session

We actually came up with this crazy idea to drive all the way up to Genting
to have our Starbucks drinks
..chill out around there for like 2 hours
and then drove back to KL & Seremban..
Road trips and travelling have been my favourite things to do
to escape myself away from stress and problems that I never wanna think about
Ma girls are my best companion for travelling besides ma mom.. <3

there we go.. shooting all the way up to Genting :)

SOMEONE claimed that we were momre to cam-whore session
rather than road trip session..
yes.. we are girls.. this is our habit being a fantastic camwhore :p

we can never live without MCD.

Our First meal of the day..

And this was the time where we can gain weight from this road trips..

our attempt succeeded! Starbucks all the way up from Genting

the temptation look towards choc cake

4 iphone freak users..
No doubt iphone is the best social network telecommunication..

This place that we went was seriously pretty scary to us..

it situated halfway on the way up to Genting.

they has this statue stage by stage showing what will you go through

at the hell due to the sin that you have did when you were still alive..

From littering, to lying to stealing.. all sorts of sin..

dinner time..
we had the best and satisfying meal of the day with our empty stomach..
at Seremban .. treated by Miss Theresa...

Day 2 - time to hunt for more food

this is what happen when we get too hungry waiting for other to be awake...

our breakie at Dim sum restaurant called Min Kok
and it was our best dim sum restaurant we ever eaten..
or maybe we were too hungry
the food were awesome till we dont mind to drive all the way up to Seremban
to have dim sum

this is what happen when girls gone crazy and sampat

we cant leave Seremban without the famous Seremban siew pow..

sleeping beauty

*this was random , n til now she dont even know this pic was taken*

Sum up our day with the best coffee in melaka..
We-coffee

Currently listening to ...

2011-07-23T15:05:00.000+08:00

i love mizz nina.. she is the only malaysian that I would actually listen to...

Nicki Minaj and Jessie J are an awesome singers. these two songs I can play like over and over again everyday.. i would never get bored with their songs.

2011-07-18T16:52:00.000+08:00

Good-byes make you think, they make you realize what you've had, what you've lost, and what you've taken for granted.

Hello made you realized there is more great and wonderful things waiting ahead of you :)

stay positive ♥

real story of participant BERSIH rally

2011-07-11T01:21:00.000+08:00

Found this article online... a very emotional article that I would like to share with everyone.. A story of a guy named Steven Lee who recently witnessed and participate in the Bersih 2.0 rally..

50,000 people had participated BERSIH 2.0 Rally, and there were 50,000 stories. Another great article by Steve Lim, please give him a big "LIKE" !!!

I am just a normal person, trapped in the rat race, trying to earn for a living. I am concerned about the politics in Malaysia, but wasn't bothered too much, because I think I can't make a chance for a better Malaysia. I heard about the Bersih 2.0, where people are trying to fight for a fair election. However, police are trying to stop the peace demonstration, they threaten to catch people who join the rally, who wear yellow on 709. Everyone is in fear, so do I.

I met bunch of my close friends for dinner on the eve 709. My friends told me they are going for the demonstration, I wasn't so sure, because the fear in me. But I asked myself a question, I been living this country almost 23 years, what had I done for my country. None. So I decided to join. I am not an extremist, I don't want to fight with the police, I don't want to commit crime, I just want to walk in peace to let the government hear the voices of the people.

Despite the drama how the government played the Bersih rally out, ask them to cancel the street rally and gather in stadium instead, and reject the permit to demonstrate in the stadium in the last minute. Police blocked all the access to the KL city, road block and check the entire citizen who tried to enter the city. Instead, they just can arrange a meeting to hear Bersih out, and allow them to hand the very sensible memorandum. But, no, they were too afraid, they were afraid the change will cost them the political power to rule the government, they want their citizen to stay home and let the government do whatever they want to do.

709, wake up in the morning with great spirit, friends are coming over and started dressing up in yellow. But read the tweets from Bersih, try not to wear yellow till we get into the demonstration. So we ditch the plan to wear yellow. Take monorail to Hang Tuah, had our brunch in Times Square and planning our road map to the gather. We are looking at everyone in the street, they look back in your eyes, at that moment, you know that you are not alone.

Followed by a big crowd, we slowly marching towards to the Hentian Pudu. Once we reach, you can see thousands of people already there. Malay, Chinese, Indian, even foreigners are there. From young, middle age to old, everyone is there. Chanting, "Bersih Bersih, Pilihan Raya". As we marching closer to the hentian pudu, FRU already block the access there.

Out of sudden, they started to fire the tear gas at the innocent citizen. I was lucky at first, the tear gas didn't affect me. We march to opposite direction, they block us again. So we trying to go back the original direction. We were stuck again. We didn't give up, you could hear the chanting everywhere, so I followed. We sang our national anthumn very loud and proud, we just want them army forces to know, we come in peace, we are Malaysian and we love our country very much. The trucks tried to drive to our direction, we all sat down on the road to prove that we are not afraid.

Out of sudden, they fired the tear gases at us. This time I wasn't lucky, I was coughing like crazy, eyes hurts like mad and I can't even breath. We are panic, but we didn't run. Instead, we let the women to pass through first. As we let the women to run from the tear gases, they fired another round of tear gases, right in the middle of the crowds, this time we are in trouble. We ran back near to Tung Shin Hospital, and they still keep firing the tear gases, you could see the women, old uncle and auntie are suffering, so did I. I was very angry, how could they treated their own citizen like this? We are not terrorist, we march in peace, we didn't start any fight with the army forces, and they couldn't careless.

"One of the worst acts of violence, police fired tear gas into the compound of Tung Shin Hospital, severely jeopardizing the health not only of the rakyat who had sought refuge there, but the patients there as well. This was one of only various acts of totally unwarranted violence by the police against a rakyat who had exercised their constitutional right to gather peacefully." from Bersih official website.

You probably think the violence end there, no, you are dead wrong. They corned us, at the hospital car park and start to use their water canon to spray the chemical water at us. I am among one of the victim. You felt the burn in your whole body, the pain is almost unbearable, and soon you eyes hurts like mad, you can't breathe and you can't see, people are trying to run away from the water canon. I was in very dangerous situation, due to immense pain, I almost fainted and someone just held my hand and walk me. The malay uncle offered me salt, the indian lady was offering me drinks, someone just pass the cream for me to ease my pain. At that moment, you know, that's the country that you want to live in, no races differentiation, only people with a kind heart.
They started another round of tear gases and we had to climb over the hills and walk to Bursa. Again, you probably think the pain caused will scare us and we will just walk back home. Again, you are dead wrong. We all rest for a while to get over the pain caused and we start our second round of marching. This time, the number of people is getting larger and larger. We chanted the Bersih cheers, all the way in the street, passing by P.Ramlee streets all the way to KLCC. Cars and motorcycles are horning, people are cheering for our bravery, the scene is beautiful.

We walked all the way to the KLCC and we sat down peacefully on the road. The number of people is amazing, you can feel the power of people, the power of unity. At the moment you thought no one will actually join the demonstration until you see the number of people who join the rally, you know, there is still hope in the country. We sat down and listen to the talk of the leaders, we sang the Negaraku, we shouted our heart out. You can feel the passion, the love of nation, the warmth of the people. After roughly 30 mins, we all leave the place in peace.

Aftermaths:
To the governments
Thank you to the government for making such a good effort to stop this event from happening, you are actually doing a free promotion for the event. Thank you the road blocks, people got nothing better to do on the weekends, so more people are joining the rally. Thank you for using violence at the citizens, you make us realised we are actually just animal to you.

To the people who joined the demonstration
Thank you for your participation. That was truly a 1 Malaysia Gathering. We can't make it, if either one of you were not there. We made today a history, we taught government a valuable lesson.

To people who didn't join the demonstration
It's alright that you didn't join, we could feel your spirit with us. Keep spreading the news, help to create the awareness!

Signing off,Steve Lim

Malaysia Version of Transformer

2011-07-10T14:22:00.002+08:00

watch this. best video editing i ever seen here.. it feel like im watchin a movie.. transformer.. one sound like optimus prime..
Best line in the video : You may lose your faith in us, but never in yourselves. From now on, the fight will be your own."

BERSIH 2.0 protest

2011-07-09T16:49:00.005+08:00

BERSIH 2.0 is what we call as 1Malaysia..

All different races manage to gather all together for protest..

Even our own government cant able to gather all races together.

this shows how powerful BERSIH is compared to the Government..
Pak Samad Said at press conference: "I have never seen all the races in Malaysia so united in one cause before" This is the real 1MALAYSIA...Bravo guys

all we want is fair election..

people with creative mind... cool one!

To make things worst, take a look at what our own prime minister's action

for this BERSIH thingy

"Our Prime Minister is abandoning the nation at its most crucial time, says Charles Santiago"

Any leader would stay in his country during the time of a political turmoil. Our Prime Minister is abandoning the nation at its most crucial time.

Check out this article :

http://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/2011/07/08/najib-should-postpone-his-trip/

another article here stated that:

Former US ambassador John R Malott believes Prime Minister Najib Tun Razak’s “is running scared” given his guile handling of Bersih.

http://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/2011/07/08/ex-us-envoy-najibs-running-scared/

this video shows how rude malaysia minister on an interview

another video describe malaysia current situation..

Protest of BERSIH in Melbourne

this video caught my attention the most.
most sporting and brave uncle whom try to fight for our rights..
salute him

Love is in the air

2011-07-08T20:46:00.000+08:00

these people made my life felt awesome all the time...

Life never been easy..

but with them around, everything seems easy and great...

haters>fans

2011-06-25T23:36:00.002+08:00

Last few days, me and my friends were randomly chatting about Justin Bieber in the car..
One of my friends actually said he had more haters than fans. Me and my other friends told her off, if he do have more haters than friends, he wont be successful like now.. Billionaire kid..
But today, just being randomly checking out his video on you tube, he seriously has more haters.
Check out the link below on his video.. He has the number of 'dislike' more than 'like'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kffacxfA7G4

anyways, Im not a fan of him at all..
currently, Im super addicted to Adele's songs.. All her songs were amazing. She sang what she had gone through.. And listen to it, make me felt Im not the only one feeling how I felt now. her songs do calm me and made me think a lot. in a positive way :)

Begin the day with a smile

2011-06-22T11:45:00.003+08:00

Your whole day often depends on how you greet the morning. It’s no secret that often times when your morning gets off to a poor start, your day goes down with it into a spiral of negativity.

Ever wake up and stumble out of bed only to find the day follows with one bad thing after another?

It’s no mistake…

once your mind takes you to a negative place it’s hard to turn it around unless you make a conscious effort to do so. It’s always beneficial to greet each day with energy, high spirits, and positivity.

When you wake up in the morning, try to flood your mind with positive optimism about life and the day ahead. Reciting positive affirmations and counting your blessings are great morning rituals. And don’t forget to smile…

it doesn’t cost a dime but its worth everything.

*trying to stay positive every single day is the only thing I can do

in order to make myself happy*

We do not want sexist nonsense from Global Ikhwan Sdn.Bhd

2011-06-15T15:15:00.001+08:00

As you all know, the Obedient Wives Club issues have been raised up recently and now this topic

being discussed by everyone all around the world. And it got on to the news from around the world..

The Club, which just opened a new chapter in Malaysia (Jordan's got one, and Indonesia's getting one soon), is an invention of Global Ikhwan Sdn Bhd—an organization made up of ex-members of an Islamic group called Al-Arqam, which scored a hit two years ago with their Ikhwan Polygamy Club. At least 800 women have already joined! Club vice president Dr. Rohaya Mohamad says "good or religious" wives will be mindful of stepping up their sexual game, because it pleases their husbands and, in turn, makes God happier.

SO, the anti OWC facebook group called " We do not want sexist nonsense from Global Ikhwan Sdn. Bhd " was created to condemns the club formed by Global Ikhwan Sdn.Bhd. The company has recently formed a club called the "OBEDIENT WIVES CLUB" or "KELAB TAAT SUAMI" which has raised a number of issues which concerns sexism and sexual performance of wives as the way to sustain a marriage. We feel that this OWC is wrong because it gives the wrong message and at the same time degrading to women. Therefore, we should step up to address this issue. Sexism is a wrong concept which involves the mistreatment of an individual or group based on their sex.

I personally shocked with the existing of the OWC because I could hardly believe my eyes when I read the article of the founder of OWC implication that wives who do not so much as obey their spouses are to be held responsible for domestic abuse and for the reasons their husbands solicit the services of prostitutes. I couldn't understand the rationale behind this logic as I find it utterly nonsense.

People, start joining this facebook group to help to fight to the right for women..

simply click this link below..

We do not want sexist nonsense from Global Ikhwan Sdn.Bhd

this group has spread around the world , France, Aus, China, ..

I even have a few women from France in that group told me that they joined the group because she saw these OWC article were posted first page on their French newspaper..

some of the French women told me

" How can Women just accept this humiliation??? How can they believe this is what God asks for"

"I'll do what I can to gather friends from France to help you to close this ridiculous club"

it was amazing how the words spread everywhere and they totally did not ignore this

and tried to do whatever they can to help. currently, this anti OWC facebook group is collaborating with the founder of a campaign organization called White Ribbon .White Ribbon is a campaign championed in Malaysia by Reach Out a local NGO, to involve men in tackling violence against women. It is a joint initiative by a coalition of global organisations, individuals and groups of men. Reach Out are part of the international White Ribbon Campaign, which is the largest effort in the world of men working to end violence against women, with campaigns in over 55 countries.

so it is your turn to play your part by joining the group today .

Most Romantic Marriage Proposal Ever

2011-06-08T19:05:00.001+08:00

Watch this first....

Then, watch this..

this is the greatest wedding I ever seen...
A lucky girl who had her worst heartbreak and at the same time,
she had her best day ever in her whole life..
it was the surprise of her life time.
This proposal and wedding ceremony straight on the spot is much better and cooler than the fairytale royal wedding.
this is what they called fairytale wedding.

Awesome June

2011-06-02T12:29:00.001+08:00

Nothing else could be better than an awesome June...

As the saying goes, Live Life to the fullest..

That is what I am going to do <3

*finger crossed*

FRIEND

2011-05-30T18:58:00.001+08:00

“Friends. A simple word isn’t it? It’s uttered everyday to almost every person imaginable. Who are your friends? I used to think that friends were the people that you could laugh and talk to. Now I know that friends aren’t that, they’re the people that touch your hearts. You could spend hours with them doing nothing at all and it can be the best time of your life, just because it was with them. They’re the people you can share your secrets with, cry with, laugh with, and just have fun with. They don’t judge you or make you change. They accept you exactly as you are. They tends to forgive anything you ever do, if they dont, they are not worth calling them as FRIEND. They look at you and they see a great person, one they love spending time with. You all share something in common and are tied together by memories, tears, laughs, and smiles. You’re tied together by love for the other. Friendship is the strangest but greatest thing in the world. I find my time with my friends, the best times of my life. My friends are my heart, my soul, my fun, my laughter, tears, love and my life.”

Recently, I have been meeting up with great people in my life. Some were friends who I had lost contact with, Some were people whom I never talk to but I do know them, Some were people whom I ignore because I do not know them but they do know me. Then I began to realized all this while, I have been abandoned all the people who truly cares for me. I felt myself being so selfish in friendship because the past Me will only care and pay attention to friends whom I am close with only. The selfish'ness in me made me facing up my own consequence which I least expect to happen. What happen recently was a friend of mine whom I used to close with suddenly came up to me and said " I have been always wanting to tell you this.. I'm sorry if I did hurt you the last time " .. It totally touched my heart.. as I never came across us finally being mature and talk to each other over it after quite some time. I promised myself not to stick to only friend whom Im close with because even closest friend might be the one who are able to stab you back just because they knew you the most. From now on, I am going to take pre caution in anything I do before getting hurt by people I love.

I have learnt that there are some people in life that will do anything to bring you down to your knees especially the time when you made mistakes and they took the advantage to see you fall but not supporting you although they were your friends. However, you yourself have the choice to use it to make you stronger or to fall. Because in life, we had to know that we never lose friends, we only learn who is our true ones are.

What's best?? Perodua, of course! What's BEST of the best? #PeroduaLagiBest! Compose the most creative video and win EM10k!

2011-05-27T15:16:00.000+08:00

What's best?? Perodua, of course! What's BEST of the best? #PeroduaLagiBest! Compose the most creative video and win EM10k!

silent heart finally speaks

2011-05-22T19:04:00.001+08:00

one great piece of music

2011-05-15T11:20:00.001+08:00

and she is only 14th.. Her standard of music cant even be compared to Beabielll..
this is what they call.. talent

my habits

2011-05-14T21:15:00.003+08:00

MY 10 HABITS THAT I REALIZED RECENTLY:
1. I sleep with the lights on
2. My plates will never be clean after I finished my food. It is my habit to leave small little portion of food on
my plate
3. When I'm angry or hurt, I need spicy food to cure them
4. When I'm down, i locked myself in the room and listen to songs with deep meaningful lyrics to motivate myself
5. I need to play 1 hour of games on my phone to make myself fall asleep
6. When I have problems in my heart, my dog will be the first one I confess to
7. When I have nothing to do, I would day-dreaming to fill up my time
8. If someone piss me off, I will not hesitate to confront them
9. I shop a lot/ buy things which is out of my interest to release my temper/ tension
10. When I want something, I would make sure I get it ( and I always do get what I want) *one of the bad habit that i shall change*
11. I will never eat anything with bones in it
12. I always have a bottle of peanut butter with me in my bag whenever I go.. in case Im hungry :P

Lessons Learned by Carrie Underwood with Lyrics

2011-05-05T02:07:00.001+08:00

song with powerful lyrics..

Prince William and Kate Middleton wedding

2011-04-30T02:45:00.000+08:00

the wedding that everyone has been waiting for this year
the fairy tale wedding that everyone talking about..

watching this wedding reminds me of Late Princess Diana

whom i adore

meet the designer of Kate Middleton's lovely gown

~Sarah Burton~

Middleton chose Alexander McQueen designer Sarah Burton to make her wedding gown.

"She is very elegant. The dress is classic and goes very well in the Westminster decor.

even her dress matched her .. simple and elegant

The brunette beauty unveiled her highly-anticipated wedding gown to the world on her big day in London, putting an end to months of rumours over who had been given the task of designing the famous frock.

Seconds after Kate Middleton emerged from her car outside Westminster Abbey in a ball gown with lace sleeves, designers around the country, glued to their TV sets, were sketching her look, setting in motion a mad rush for mass-produced versions that are expected to be in stores as early as late June.

*these designers are so quick in hand in copying the Royal Gown*

The eight-tiered Royal Wedding cake decorated with 900 sugar-paste flowers

(with a secret symbolic meaning)

Along the cake's base ran ivy leaves, symbolising marriage, and the bottom three tiers were decorated with piped lace work and daisies, meaning innocence, sweet William - grant me one smile - and lavender.

they took care of the cake very details

am so amazed by that..

Flowers that featured on the cake which bring different meanings each :

Rose (white) - national symbol of England

Daffodil - national symbol of Wales, new beginnings

Shamrock - national symbol of Ireland

Thistle - national symbol of Scotland

Acorns, oak leaf - strength, endurance

Myrtle - love

Ivy - wedded love, marriage

Lily of the valley - sweetness, humility

Rose (bridal) - happiness, love

Sweet William - grant me one smile

Honeysuckle - the bond of love

Apple blossom - preference, good fortune

White heather - protection, wishes will come true

Jasmine (white) - amiability

Daisy - innocence, beauty, simplicity

Orange blossom - marriage, eternal love, fruitfulness

Lavender - ardent attachment, devotion, success, and luck.

The masterpiece: Fiona Cairns, stands next to the wedding cake that she and her team made for Prince William and his wife Kate, Duchess of Cambridge

Dessert buffet: The chocolate biscuit McVities cake that was specially requested by Prince William

Around 1,900 people have been invited to the service at Westminster Abbey, with about 650 people invited to the lunchtime reception at Buckingham Palace given by the Queen, and approximately 300 people invited to the dinner at Buckingham Palace given by The Prince of Wales.

the majority, more than 1,000, are drawn from Prince William and Miss Middleton’s family and friends.

- more than 50 Members of the Royal Family

- more than 40 members of foreign royal families

- more than 200 members of government, parliament and diplomatic corps;

- approximately 80 guests are drawn from Prince William’s charities, including some individuals who are not in senior positions, who the Prince has known for some time;

- 60 governors-general and realm prime ministers;

- 30 members of the defence services

Guest that made it to the Royal Wedding includes:

Elton John

Rowan Atkinson aka Mr Bean

My fav. couple,

David Beckham and Victoria

*damn.. i love her pump*
Definitely getting that if i found the alike ones..

lastly... even

Yang Dipertua Agong and his permaisuri were there to attend his wedding

this is so cool *Katy Perry's nail art*

Never Say Never

2011-04-23T17:55:00.001+08:00

when i hear people saying Never Say Never...
the first thing pop up from my mind is The Fray..
so i dont understand how on earth people would actually think of Beaber
Never Say Never by The Fray only considered good piece of music
not that beaber with his crooked sound.

2011-04-23T17:25:00.002+08:00

calling me

DESPERATE!!!

pls look at your mirror...

you are

DESPERATE

for

NAME

POWER

FACE

FAME

P.S : People do need to becareful this person.. HE/SHE know black magic and HE/SHE did used it on people before. HE/SHE likes to pretend to the be the good boy/girl... Hell knows..
what he/she did before.. .

Strangers, again

2011-04-21T21:09:00.002+08:00

this shows how a relationship changed tru times..
after watching this video.. it made me think a lot
everything happen in that video is what happen in reality
and why is it everyone have to go through all this in a relationship..
always wondering..

Leave me alone!

2011-04-21T20:59:00.001+08:00

How the hell on earth do PEOPLE actually got my new number

that easily and quickly!!!

This freaking retarded PEOPLE

Get the hell out of my life!

Dont tried to call me just to test who am i

you guys really has nothing else better to do

Pathetic lil creature who thinks they are super

MATURED,,,,,

Im going to hope for the worst in your life..

For the last time,

leave me alone!

Céline Dion - Alone

2011-04-19T16:07:00.001+08:00

my all time favourite singer. :)

fakers

2011-04-18T23:06:00.000+08:00

people like you guys

seriously pathetic

dare to say but not dare to do it

always go around telling people

that you cant take it and going to leave uni..

every single time...

the same complain about leaving uni

all you all did was just wordssss....

only good at bragging about it

threatening to leave forever...

all you guys give is just bragging..

im dump to fall for that..

*glad that someone would actually came to confront every single thing you all did in the past which i did not knew at all.. all you guys did were pretending in front of me...fakers! salute you with your great acting*

Leaving you for good

2011-04-14T19:21:00.002+08:00

Bye Bye to Malaysia

Im leaving you for GOOD

because you are way too ~~wonderful~~ depressing for me

this time i promised myself im going to leave everything behind

and will never look back.

*on my way to the other side of world in a few more hours*
excited~~
am always the adventurous type of girl ...
something that i will never change for anyone no matter what

party!!

2011-04-13T21:39:00.004+08:00

Birthday boy..

birthday boy got 'splash' with cake =happy birthday today=

im in red! =.=
*note: i dont remember taking this pic same goes to the one below*

this is the first time i got 'wasted'. my lovely gal got me into this.

and the 'after drunk' feeling was totally a disaster.

cant even remember what happen, what i did and what i said..
hung over+headache+stomach burning+body aching
but i felt great afterall.. a night without worries and problems

but one thing good about getting yourselves drunk

was we danced all night long

and for the first time, i was having fun without thinking

of my past

and it was the first night, i went to bed soundly

without taking sleeping pills...
thanks my girls who had to take care of me and got me home safety..
sorry that you girls have to see me at my worst..
after that night, been receiving lotsa of text from those who party with me
asking whether am i ok...
makes me wonder what actually happen that night
until people would ask me this.. haha
some even able to see that i was emotionally unstable..
because i know that night was not who i am..
anyways.. it was totally turn off when the club starts playing a stupid song by
Justin Bieber.. baby baby baby..
C'mon.. of all songs.. that??!

i told myself , i will not dwell with the past anymore..

12.4.2011

2011-04-12T22:00:00.002+08:00

NEW NUMBER

NEW HANDPHONE

NEW CLOTHES

NEW HAIRSTYLE

AND OF COURSE NEW BEGINNING OF LIFE

i got it all today...
am loving my life even more now :)

"Never think about the past it brings tears, Don't think about the future it brings fears, Live this moment with a smile good and cheers"

i love disney

2011-04-11T23:44:00.000+08:00

miss the disneyland moment

2011-04-10T11:48:00.001+08:00

This is my first time waking up feeling freaking awful.

the consequence of taking too much alcohol is bad...

I cant even remember what happen last night...

but let it all out everything that feeling so tensed recently was good..

maybe this is the only way for me to let go all my feeling after what had happen in my life..
or i can say.. it is over....

Bruno Mars - Today My Life Begins

2011-04-09T21:36:00.001+08:00

i've been working hard so long

seems like pain has been my only friend

my fragile heart's been done so wrong

i wondered if i'd ever heal again

ohh just like all the seasons never stay the same

all around me i can feel a change

i will break these chains that bind me, happiness will find me

leave the past behind me, today my life begins

a whole new world is waiting it's mine for the taking

i know i can make it, today my life begins

yesterday has come and gone

and i've learn how to leave it where it is

and i see that i was wrong

for ever doubting i could win

ohh just like all the seasons never stay the same

all around me i can feel a change

i will break these chains that bind me, happiness will find me

leave the past behind me, today my life begins

a whole new world is waiting it's mine for the taking

i know i can make it, today my life begins

life's to short to have regrets

so i'm learning now to leave it in the past and try to forget

only have one life to live

so you better make the best of it

i will break these chains that bind me, happiness will find me

leave the past behind me, today my life begins

a whole new world is waiting it's mine for the taking

i know i can make it, today my life begins

i will break these chains that bind me, happiness will find me

leave the past behind me, today my life begins

a whole new world is waiting it's mine for the taking

i know i can make it, today my life begins

today my life begins...

I want to meet Justin Bieber ;; Malaysia ;;

2011-04-07T22:56:00.002+08:00

found this on friend's fb
seriously, the world needs to wake up.
she makes herself look BIMBO ! =.=
because i dont see anything good in JB
which makes her react like that
JB really sucks. i resent him badly!
INSANE!

i love twitter

2011-04-07T13:49:00.006+08:00

Twitter inspired me a lot :)

ever since i came back, been receiving lotsa of phone calls from my uni mates

i am touched knowing that peoples whom I barely talk to in my uni

takes the initiative to call me and talked to me for hours.

some even said they wanted to quit uni with me and asked me to bring them along

sorry for those who called but i was not able to answer

because my mom currently using my number.

i have changed my cell number..

i even had friend who willing to call me from oversea to talk to me to calm me

felt grateful and finally realized that i should pay attention to everyone around me

not just stick close to that particular friends

maybe it is my fault.. im way too naive esp. comes to friendship

Friend insist that we shall look for them when we have any problems

when we never look for them, they question us.

But they walk away then they got tired of us looking for them

*another lesson learnt* :)

and... one more thing which made me day

was Karma really do pay off...

and i had a friend really good at cursing people.

when she curse, it really happens to that particular person

*scary*

"There comes a point in your life when you realize who really matters..who never did..and who always will"

my angels

2011-04-05T00:08:00.002+08:00

Been spending few of my days with this lovely ladies for the past 2 weeks.. Things has been better with them around. We spent time talking about everything... relationships, family, studies, .. then I realized that I am not the only one going through all the pains and mistake that I did. am so glad to have people who actually understand what i am going through. i felt even grateful to have them because they dont judge me based on the mistakes i did. they never walk away after knowing what i did. not forgetting a Bintulu girl who still stuck in Sabah were there for me through all the thick and thin. Totally appreciate her as she is the only one stood still who really supports me even though people were talking on me but she doesn't care. You know who you are ♥ ONE SENTENCE FOR YOU GUYS :

Note: Feel free to view my current active blog http://mychaoticlyfe.tumblr.com/
I blogged more often in tumblr than here.

Gary Barlow - Holding Back The Tears

2011-04-03T15:36:00.002+08:00

before my uncle head back to his home, he told me to listen to olden days song by Gary Barlow
so i try listened to his song.. totally not bad
my uncle has a great taste in songs and singers..

2011-04-02T22:33:00.004+08:00

"I don't regret anything I said, or anything I did.

The only thing I regret was crying over you.

You're not worth my tears"

Avril Lavigne - What The Hell

2011-04-02T03:01:00.002+08:00

''What the Hell" is all I can tell you people :)

Peace :)

Family comes first

2011-03-30T22:30:00.000+08:00

this show really made me in a teary eyes condition

what an emotional episode..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EenSfXH6oU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hp6yY4VbCm4&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fl9eCUYDMTA

All about me

2011-03-26T15:32:00.002+08:00

I am a cuddler - Yes

I am a morning person - No

I am a perfectionist - No

I am an only child - No

I am a Buddhist - Yes

I am currently in my pajamas - No

I am in a complicated life - Yes

I am currently suffering from a broken heart - Yes

I am okay at styling other people’s hair - No

I am left handed - No

I am addicted to facebook - Not anymore

I am very shy around the opposite gender AT FIRST - Yes

I bite my nails - No

I can be paranoid at times - Yes

I currently regret something that I have said - Yes

When I get mad I curse frequently - Sometimes

I like someone - No

I enjoy pop music - No

I listen music by understanding the lyrics- Yes

I enjoy talking on the phone - Yes

I have a pet - Yes

I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal - Yes

I have a tendency to fall for the “wrong” person - Yes

I have all my grandparents - No

I have at least one sibling - Yes

I have been told that I am smart - Yes (but I'm not)

I have broken a bone - No

I have more than one ex - Yes

I have been in love with the wrong person - Yes

I have changed a diaper - Yes

I have changed a lot over the past year - Yes

I have done something illegal - No

I have gone through the worst day- Yes

I have killed another person - No

I have had my hair cut within the last week - No

I have kissed someone I knew I shouldn’t - Yes

I have did a mistake which I never thought I would do - Yes

I have hatred toward betrayers - Yes

I have learn to forgive and forget - Yes

2011-03-26T11:33:00.000+08:00

this is the first time i ever consume this large amount of medicine..
some pills include pills that calm a person down without letting the person think too much.. and it really works for me.

Ashley Tisdale it's alright it's okay Lyrics

2011-03-23T17:42:00.000+08:00

IM OK WITHOUT YOU!!!

pixxies

2011-03-22T13:36:00.000+08:00

倪安東 - Sorry That I Loved You (HQ官方版MV)

2011-03-21T18:06:00.000+08:00

life is unpredictable

2011-03-21T13:00:00.005+08:00

finally reach my home sweet home today,
the feeling of being home, the smell of my bed is great.
yes.. im back..
As you all know that earthquakes which happened recently in Japan caused tsunami strikes..
according to Star newspaper,
http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2011/3/12/nation/8244411&sec=nation
There was tsunami alert in the Sabah neighbouring area. everyone in Sabah are being alert to stay away from sea. so my mom decided to fly to Sabah to pick me back here to Melaka in order to stay away from the tsunami that might occurs anytime. She was worried about my safety so she brought me back.

Then today i got a called from my mom saying one of my uncle has passed away this morning.then i saw my mom came back in tears. As i remembered, the last time she ever cried was when my dad passed away 5 years ago. and today she was in tears again shows that it was very hard for her to accept the fact that my uncle is now gone to somewhere far. it was way too sudden as no one would expect this to happen because he is always in good health. luckily I am back to be able to make it for the funeral to show my last respect. but today i was not allowed to visit him as today is my birthday in the Chinese lunar calendar which means my uncle died on my birthday. the dates were clashed. all i can do today is stay at home, getting updates from my mom . I just felt like this year totally a bad luck for me.everyone that i care and love leaving one by one. life is just unpredictable. Rest In Peace, my dear uncle.

one day, people will see the truth

2011-03-18T16:39:00.002+08:00

Your own life had been already f*cked up by yourself

Don't try to f*ck up others

Don't ruin others' life

Just because yours was totally ruined

You may look innocent

But truthfully, you are not

I knew every single dirty little dark secret of yours with PROOF
What you did was much worst than me
More like a monster

I have always been keeping my lips sealed

since people like you always wanted some 'face'

Just to cover up your dirty little secrets

You pushed all the blames to one side

Bravo!

I salute you for such a good acting all this while

I salute you for all the drama you created

I salute you for making small matters into something big

that it could ruin a person's life
It is not that I did not admit what I did
I did wrong and tried to ask for forgiveness
I admit things I did and defend things I did not do
But
You were not even sorry for what you have caused
But acted like you were the hero of the day
With all the sins you have did,
you were not responsible at all
And yet pretend like nothing happen

Don't push my limit

Until I spill out the bean

And people will know you are not

as innocent as they think you are
Lastly, don't say something that you don't mean it.

love

2011-03-12T02:34:00.001+08:00

Love is dangerous enough

when it blindsides us,

and unexpectedly

We find ourselves in its clutches,

spellbound by a certain someone

and eating our hearts.

Mistakes that i regret the most

2011-03-06T00:24:00.000+08:00

one week ago, we were happily, enjoying our days by getting busy together. one week later,today.. everything changed in just a blink. I had the worst week ever for the past few days. the thing that i face now is like a trauma to me. i blamed it myself. for not appreciate it when it was on my hand. since last sunday, things ended up pretty badly, then it turned out kinda much better, however it got even worst the day after due to a misinterpret message of a friend to close friends of mine.but i had to blame myself for doing things without thinking. at that point, i was totally down and emotional. and this friend of mine was walking beside me when i was in tears. so i decided to let out my feeling unintentionally to let him know the consequence of finding trouble with others and act without thinking which will ended up like me all alone, being ignored. however, he mistakenly pass this messages to close friends of mine, telling them that i was actually talking bad about them. now they totally treated me like Im no one to them anymore. it felt hurts because it was not my intention at all.

an educated guy with lotsa knowledge came to me and my friend who was a stranger to us .talked to us about life, love, friendship out of sudden. it felt like God was sending me a message by telling me how overcome it. it felt like he could see what problem im facing at that time. his words really made me felt a bit better..
however, each time when I am alone, I felt totally down and emo ,starting to think of all the memories we used to share. all i want is a chance to change myself . all i want is things to go back to normal. all this really changed me to a cheerful girl who always smile to a girl who looks moody all the time. until a person told me, i look like i am having depression.i wish to turn back time. never want things to turn out this bad. all i need is support and forgiveness. but each day, disappointment came to me until i wish that im not awake anymore after i go to bed. it felt so pointless to go on this life. because i was not given a chance to make things right. i know i made a very big mistake in my life. i know i am wrong.when things was good, i did not appreciate but when thing went wrong, then only i start to feel guilty.it was all my fault, i should have appreciate them at the first place. i may look strong from the outside but my weakness all shown when it comes to friendship.

in a relationship, there is always 'give n take'

2011-02-20T20:39:00.002+08:00

Saw this post in a person's blog. and it got my attentions

During the Relationship

Your mind says, “I deserve more – this relationship is not right.”

Your heart says, “Stay, it will work out.”

If you were in a relationship where it was obvious that you were not receiving the love, respect, and engagement that you deserve, then your mind was probably nudging you during the relationship and asking you, “Why are we still here?”

You remained in that relationship for longer than you should have because your heart believed that your mate and relationship could change.

Your heart believed that it was better to be in a relationship that was mediocre than to be alone.

Your heart was saying to you, “Hey, give it a chance, it’s not that bad.”

Your mind and heart were not aligned and this probably led to fighting, to an internal struggle, and eventually the break up.

Often when we want more from a relationship than we are getting, we continually try to get ‘more’ by attempting to change the person we are with or by forcing other changes in the relationship. This is generally a destructive
path.

2011-02-20T15:14:00.000+08:00

Life is sucks
Life is totally unfair
I'm still hanging on, faking my smiles every single day
although I'm being treated unfair.
Each time I am alone in the middle of the night, everything flash into my mind once again.
Am sulking up all the pain alone. telling myself no point crying over spilled milk.
Just felt like Im not the girl who i used to be anymore.
all i want is everything to goes back to normal.
i wanna live a normal life.

current addiction

2011-01-30T16:05:00.000+08:00

this boy proof that this is what they call real talent.. compare to Justin Bieber. JB is nothing. Greyson is much more better. when i first hear him on radio, i thought it was another Carrie Underwood's song which got my attention. then i look for this song. then only i realise it was Greyson who got famous through on of his previous youtube video

2011-01-26T18:16:00.001+08:00

it is so hard to please everyone...

whatever i do, it seems wrong to you in every way..

people love to talk, please stop making assumption about my life

please do not ask anyone about me..

who am i ??

2011-01-21T23:01:00.000+08:00

i had abandoned my blog for a long time. it is not because im bored and i dont know what to write. it is just that ever since im back here in Sabah, i have been keeping myself way too busy with events and project that im handling now until all of the assignments are piled up. i just felt like this semester is much more hectic compare to last semester although i thought that i had the worst life in last semester but this current semester even worst.

before this sem starts, i told myself not to get involve with everything and keep myself focus on study. i guess im wrong. sometimes i do prefer handling events than study. but study is much lesser stress. problems keep coming and coming each day. whenever i try to solve a problem, another new problem coming to me again. it reached till the limit that me and my friends felt like we are going crazy soon and prefer to be admitted to mental health care center.

and now all my meals and my sleeping time totally messed up. whenever im not suppose to be eating, im eating.. whenever im suppose to be eating, im not eating. sometimes i had only one hour to sleep. i wish for one thing for now. only one thing. i want to my life back to normal with no stress and nothing to worry about except my studies. even cny, i need to bring back my assignments with me to be complete. this shows how suffer is university life. it is not as simple as everyone think. whenever im alone, i will start to wonder whether am i taking the right decision. y am i doing this... is it worth it that i have been way too busy til i starts to ignore people around me. i just felt that all this makes me changed a lot. felt like im not the person i used to be anymore.